Keeping my Identity

Parenting can be the strangest, hardest and most fulfilling job you've ever had. There are many exhilirations that come with being a parent. But every coin has a flip side, and one of the rough spots that the moms of Parent Soup wrestle with is the feeling that their personal identity often comes second to their roles of wife, mother, employee, etc., etc. How can you keep a balance between being true to yourself and putting your family first? And are you a horrible mother if you long to spend some "me time?" Here, the wonderful women who frequent Parent Soup talk about how they stay true to themselves in the midst of their family lives.
"I became a stay-at-home mom last summer. My husband takes the kids to my in-laws' weekend place about once every six months so I can rejuvenate. The first time I didn't think the weekend was long enough, but now I miss them by about Saturday afternoon."
"I make it a point to go out with a bunch of friends at least once a month. It is great for finding myself again."
"Take some time out for yourself! I find that my family is happier when I'm happier. If that means taking a little time for myself, then I do it."
"For me, it took going back to college and pursuing something I really wanted. I met people that I got to know not because I'm a mother/wife/housekeeper. I met people who were boring, interesting, young, old and who made me love and appreciate my family more. I was able to do it because my kids were in school themselves. Putting your mind to work is a wonderful feeling!"
"When I start feeling that way, that's when I have to take a shopping trip, girls' night out, or just rent some sappy love story movie that nobody else wants to watch and sit with a big bowl of ice cream!! I've also started some hobbies -- scrapbooking, gardening, playing on the computer -- that are my things and nobody else's! It's also nice to take a vacation by yourself or with a friend. Don't worry, those aren't unusual feelings, I don't think. If they are, then I'm unusual too!" "After being a stay at home mom for 22 years, I still feel like I have an identity of wife, Mom, and of course the picture lady at the school. I have no identity, but I know who I am. I am Me, a sum total of all those things, and the lady who yells at teenagers speeding up and down my street, the lady who will go to church and take care of anything that needs to be taken care of, and the lady who will be there if you want me to be. I guess you might say that I am a well rounded (size 24), loud mouth, mother who put up with nothing without a fight, and a wife of 22 years and a mother to 5 boys. That . . . and I am a force to reckoned with." -ivillage.com